Friday the 13th! - 13/03/20

Today I started preparations for #13. It is to be another collage piece in Blue. I have been collecting bits of magazines, sweet wrappers and wrapping paper scraps for this purpose and today I began cutting these up ready for a messy day with a glue stick tomorrow! I enjoy cutting and sticking, possibly because it takes me back to childhood but maybe also it is because of the confidence I have when using this method to be creative. Sometimes I feel quite scared by paint, just because it is so hard to change things if I don't like what I've done, particularly with watercolour. In collage you can paper over things or disguise one thing with another; it is a much more forgiving medium and I love that!

I had to do the school run today but in all honesty I'd have happily stayed inside all day and night to avoid the dreaded Friday 13th! I try not to be too silly about superstitions, however I don't have particularly brilliant memories of Sept 13th 2019 which was also a Friday. It was the day we picked up the caravan keys. The sales team were full of smiles and 'Congratulations' thinking this was an amazingly happy occasion but obviously for us it was a rather sad day that would change our lives and our little family enormously.

I had gone off in search of a new job earlier that day and unfortunately, despite being full of positivity and confidence (I'd straightened my hair and put some make-up on!) it didn't really pay off in the long run. In the weeks that followed I spent a lot of time doing visits, filling in forms, having interviews, doing shadow shifts and lots of training but my mental and physical health meant I was simply not well enough to commit to the job, despite it being a casual one. The optimism I had around becoming a working professional again back in September has sadly dwindled as time has gone on. Looking back, 6 months have passed since then and it is just such a shame that things haven't turned out better for me on the work front! I know I secured a Temporary contract over Christmas but other than that...it is yet another thing that I feel I have failed at.

There was also a Friday 13th back in December (interestingly, exactly 13 weeks ago and 13 weeks after the one in September!!) I was working at my Christmas Temp job...and that day didn't pass without incident! I had a customer at my till drop a six pack of red J2O's which smashed and spilled everywhere! Somehow I managed to remain calm but I did feel so sorry for the lady; she was so embarrassed. Had I been the customer rather than the cashier I would have been mortified too and would probably still be losing sleep over it now! I am not completely phobic of Friday 13th but being an anxious person and generally feeling a sense of dread from day to day anyway, this day and date is just another reason for me to want to cosy up, stay indoors and hope to get through it without disaster or incident, particularly now that everyone is panicking about Coronavirus. That would be absolutely just my luck to inadvertently come into contact with it today of all days!! Roll on tomorrow...